Witty

The best way to make people feel that you're listening to them is to listen to them.

If everyone is special, then no one is. If everyone gets a trophy, trophies become meaningless.

Make failure your friend, but not a habit. First of all, I'm not sure survival is such a bad plan.

In time you will find it easy to assume that you deserve the extra cookie. For all I know, you may. But you'll be happier, and the world will be better off, if you at least pretend that you don't.

We're all going to get cancelled one day. So do the show you want to do.

We have stone-age emotions, medieval institutions, and godlike technology. These three stanchions of current civilization explain why we are constantly in trouble.

There's a lesson in this: never start out asking for someone you'd eventually settle for.

Don't treat your heart like an action figure wrapped in plastic and never used.

When given the choice between fame and glory, take glory. Glory has a way of sneaking up on fame and stealing its lunch money later anyway.

Don't expect your ship to come in unless you sent one out.

The earth couldn't afford to send any recruiters or limos to your school. It sent you rain, sunsets, ripe cherries, night blooming jasmine, and that unbelievably cute person you are dating. Take the hint.

You can't climb the ladder of success with your hands in your pockets.